Overwhelmed

    It’s losing sleep because you don’t know how you’ll get all the things you need to get done correctly and in time.

    I’m now officially in my third trimester and, while that gives me a sense of accomplishment, it also gives me a renewed sense of panic. We’ve spent our weekends thus far travelling to see family and house hunting on the weekends, which has been wonderful, but has forced us to put off other necessary activities such as attending birthing and baby care classes, researching daycares and pediatricians and dealing with the fact that it is very likely we’ll still be stuck in our apartment when the baby comes. As I’m sure is clear by now, the house that we put an offer on back in August didn’t work out and we are still clueless about what we’re going to do come January when our lease is up.

    Sure, we still have three months in which to get everything accomplished and that seems like plenty of time, but in the meantime, mid-terms and finals are upon me and Adrian is working as much overtime as possible. With all of those things combined, it makes spending time getting the remaining ducks in a row that much more difficult.

    I know I’ve mentioned it before but we are blessed with amazing families that love and support us to the brink and beyond, and now more than ever we’re relying on their support. As a wonderful friend advised me, when you have a child, you accept the offers of kindness and assistance of others for your children’s sake and not your own. Adrian and I plan to use the weekends to clear away the rubbish, pack and clean, take classes and figure out the other details of first-time parenthood. Our families and friends have already begun planning baby showers to help us celebrate this time and take our minds off all the things we still haven’t bought and figured out. They are providing excellent advice when and where it is needed and giving words of encouragement when it’s all there is to be given. None of it goes unnoticed or unappreciated!

    Most importantly, I’m leaning more than ever on the faith that we’ll be shown the answers we need in God’s time. It’s a small consolation but consolation, nonetheless. After living a life of trying to control the minutiae and plan every contingency, I’ve had to accept that there are things we can change and things that are best left in Other Hands. For now, the things I can control, trust me, I am! I’ve scheduled birthing, breastfeeding and child care classes. I’ve scheduled a few pediatrician interviews, I've researched the reviews of the hospital and maternity ward, I’ve gathered a list of day cares that I’d like to visit and I’m working on finishing our gift registries; all single-handedly, all in good time, and all in between classes, work, and life. I’m exhausted, I’m overwhelmed, but I’m also blessed with a wonderful burden (and I mean that both literally and figuratively)!

The Diaper Debate

    We've made the decision to try out cloth diapers and our reasons are varied and many. What I have found so surprising is the number of people who have assured us that we WILL change our minds and that it won't be worth the effort.

    I don't generally appreciate people telling me what I will and will not do but regardless, the decision to use cloth diapers was not one that we made lightly. We've (well, I've) done the research and feel certain that cloth diapers will not only be far more cost-effective but will not require much more handling of poop or be any more disgusting than disposable diapers would be. Diapers are diapers and babies are babies. If you're not ready to deal with poop and pee, I (and I'm sure every mom out there) would recommend not having children just yet.

Here's some links to learn more about cloth diapers:

http://realdiaperindustry.org/cloth-diaper-resources

http://www.jilliansdrawers.com/newtocloth

http://www.diaperpin.com/howto.asp

http://www.consumerreports.org/cro/diapers/buying-guide.htm

McPregnancy

    Yes, I'm pregnant and yes, I still eat McDonald's. Yes, I feel like a quasi-failure as a mommy when I catch myself getting excited in the Drive Thru line. I can't help it. Cravings are tough to beat down no matter how gross they may be. For instance, before I got pregnant I never wanted to eat Taco Bell, but since, I'll get the idea of Taco Bell in my mind and I have to have it.

    There are theories that cravings are a hint from the body that it is lacking some essential nutrient. I can't figure out for the life of me (or Ayla's) what nutrient my body could possibly be telling me I'm lacking. McDonald's essentially has everything I should be avoiding: salt, fillers, synthetic bovine hormones. Happily not all my cravings are unhealthy. Ive also craved watermelon, frozen yogurt, chocolate milk, etc... Though, in the end, it all comes down to one letter. "C" is for craving and that's good enough for me.

No Nest to Fluff

    Pregnancy comes with many consequential attributes. One, of which I've heard is the best, is the "nesting period". During the nesting period the mom-to-be prepares the nursery, cleans the house and in all other ways physically, mentally, and emotionally prepares for the arrival of the baby. It manifests in differen ways for different mommies and is all a part of the preparation of the transition from ordinary woman to mother. From those of my friends and family that have been fortunate enough to experience the joy of a nest during the nesting period, I have been assured that it is the most fun part of pregnancy. All focus is upon the health, safety and comfort of the baby, the most important things to a mom-to-be. But what does a gal do who has no nest to... nest?!

    As many already know, Adrian's amazing parents have offered to purchase a home in the San Antonio area that Adrian and I would then rent. Nearly six months and several rejected offers later, we are still waiting and hoping for the right house to come along. In the meantime, our current apartment has cost us over $3000 in damages due to flooding, AC repairs, and miscellaneous havoc, and, as we have discovered this summer, never goes below 82 degrees during the summer months (while costing us exorbitant amounts in electricity). While the insurance claims keep mounting and I continue to wake up sweating in the middle of the night from the excessive heat, I continually think about how crucial establishing a stable and adequate environment for our child truly is. There are so many things that depend on the location of one's home: the proximity of the pediatrician and daycare, the purchase and set-up of baby furniture, the ability to ensure safety of the home itself, and most importantly, the peace of mind that we, as parents of this child, are doing everything possible to ensure our baby is healthy, happy and well cared-for.

    So how do I deal with the increasing need to "nest" and my inability to do so? I shop, crochet, read, research and generally worry myself (and by extension, Adrian) into a frenzy. There's not much else that can be done. Once a home is established, we'll be in a rush to paint & prepare the house, pack, move and organize. The more I think about how little time we have left and how rapidly it is fading away, the more saddened I become that I'm missing out on "the fun part".

    Some good news has since come our way, though. Over the Labor Day weekend, an offer was made on a great house and the offer was accepted! The option period has begun and the inspection is on Friday. I went to see the house this afternoon and it is brimming over with potential! While this is certainly a step in the right direction, I know better than to get too excited. Still, we ask that everyone pray that everything goes well and that there are no surprises during the inspection.